Galway Advertiser 2000/2000_04_27/GA_27042000_E1_024.pdf 

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Are you worried about your relationship with your partner, your parents, your children?
Share your worry - write in confidence to

AMY, C/O UP FRONT, 2/3 CHURCH LANE, GALWAY. Please Note: Amy regrets she is unable to answer letters personally

Husband doesn't know wife is in debt
/ " V Please help me with this. I have got into terrible ^ ^ d e b t in the last two years and it's now a vicious circleTl am borrowing money to pay off other loans and I see no end to it. It started with Christmas two years ago and a number of things happened since then. The debts kept mounting and I thought I could manage things. The worst thing is my husband doesn't know anything about this. He is a farmer and he has always left the money end of things to me. Having said that he would still want to keep an eye on things and I know he is getting suspicious now because I haven't let him see bank statements for nearly six months. The bank has written asking us to go in to discuss the overdraft and I am terrified be will find out. I had a full-time job when I got married but I only work part-time now because we have four children, two of them are in college. I help them out a lot and my hus band wouldn't approve of that because he thinks they should finance themselves. They work during holidays and they don't demand a lot, but it is very expensive to live away from home. Even though my husband is not a violent man he has a terrible temper. We have a lot of land and I know he could sell a site which would sort out the debt but he would die rather than do this as the land was his inheritance and he has always said be will never part with it. I can't sleep at night with the worry of this and I don't know who to turn to for help. I feel very guilty that I let things get this far and I made such a mess of i t : First of all, forget the guilt. You did your best. It didn't work out. Things mounted up. It happens to the best of us. Second, your husband has responsibility in this and he needs to start taking that on. Third, this is not at all insur mountable, you have assets to repay the loans. The real prob lem here is that you've been shouldering all this on your own, trying to manage a growing family, educate them, keep things going, without the support of your husband, and now you're in difficulties and you're still trying to manage it on your own. There are two things. You need help to sort out your finances and you need to tell your husband. It's only a matter of time before he finds out, one way or the other. He may get to the post before you or he may call into the bank himself. Go to the Money Advice & Budgeting Service (MABS 091-569349 or 093-24421), arrange to see them with your husband. You should also see a solicitor regarding your own interest in the farm. Just because your husband inherited it, it doesn't mean he has exclusive ownership; you have rights here. With your husband's support you may be able to sort out the debts without selling land. Either way, whether he likes it or not you're in this together and he has to play his part in sorting it out.

Free scan for w o m e n worried about brittle bone disease
by Mary O'Connor
W O M E N W O R R I E D ABOUT DEVELOPING OSTEOPOROSIS, THE BRITTLE BONE DISEASE, CAN NOW AVAIL OF A SIMPLE FREE SCAN WHICH WILL MEASURE THEIR BONE DENSITY AND DETECT THOSE AT RISK FROM THE CONDITION.

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The new service, which is available to women throughout the west, was launched recently by the Western Health B o a r d ' s W o m e n ' s Advisory Comrnittee. It funded the sophisticated DEXA scanning unit which will be used to measure bone density in the hips and spines of those most at risk from the condition. Local GPS will refer patients for the scan which is painless and does not require any preparation. The results are then forwarded to their doc tors who will advise patients on treatmenL if necessary. This service will work closely with a mobile PIKI scanner, which measures bone density at the heel, and which will operate from district hospitals in the west. Patients whose results indicate a need for further examination will be asked to avail of the more comprehensive DEXA scanning service at Merlin Park Regional Hospital. Speaking at the launch of the new osteoporosis screening service, Dr Sheelah Ryan, the chief executive of the WHB, said one in three women and one in 12 men will develop osteoporosis during their lifetime. "Osteoporosis is a condition in which bones become weakened or fragile as a result of inadequate calcium. Osteoporosis develops slowly and painlessly over many years, with the first knowledge of the condi tion being when a painful fracture happens after a slight fall." Some 700 women over 55 years experienced such a fracture in 1999, she said. Women are at a greater risk of developing the condition in later life if they have an early menopause or a hysterectomy. Other risk factors include poor diet, smoking, being on corticosteroid treatment over a long period, and drinking excessively. With Ireland's ageing population, the condi tion is increasing by 10 per cent per year. She said the new DEXA unit will measure bone densi ty in the hips and spine of people considered at risk of osteoporosis. "This equipment will be located in Merlin Park Hospital and will be complemented by a mobile

PIKI unit which will be taken to a number of centres throughout the region to provide a service for rural communities." Councillor Beverley Flynn TD, the chairman of the WHB, said osteo porosis is very common in Ireland with one in four women having suf fered a fracture due to the disease by the time she has reached her 60th birthday. By making healthy lifestyle choices, such as eating calcium-rich food and exercising regularly, people can protect themselves from the condi tion, she explained. Availing of the free bone density scan will provide an early warning for those at risk, she said. "As osteoporosis does not show any symp toms, it is important that people who feel they are at risk have their bone strength measured." The provision of the DEXA unit at Merlin Park Regional Hospital, supported by the mobile unit in the community, will greatly assist in the detection of this silent disease, she said. "As in many other cases, prevention is better than cure and I have no doubt that the availability of this screening service will result in a better lifestyle for our population and also, reduce costs for the State in the future."

Lions Club fundraising

Q

Boyfriend wants a baby

: I know women write to you because they want a baby and their partner does not. In my case, it's the direct opposite. I am 25 and my boyfriend is 35. We have been together five years. He has recently started talking about having a baby and even though I want to eventual ly, I am no way ready to do it yet. I am getting on well in my j o b and I need a few more years to build up my career. Apart from that I don't want a baby yet. We have a good life, we take holidays abroad and we are free to come and go as we please. My boyfriend was always more settled than me but I am worried for our future if we can't agree on this. : The issue of chidren can make or break a relationship It sounds like you haven't discussed it before your part tier's broodiness started to show. It's time for straight talking now. Tell him how you feel: that you're not ready; that you do want children but not yet. Chances are he will be pre pared to wait. Parenthood should not be undertaken lightly so don't compromise on this one.

unislim
Y U L CLCU MES OR OA LB ET GALWAY F L A N N E R Y ' S H O T E L

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WEDNESDAYS 6.30PM

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'Ring the door-bell'

GALWAY BUSHY PARK S C H O O L HALL
MONDAYS 6.30PM

: I am so embarrassed 1 can't talk to anyone about this. I called to my boyfriend's flat unexpectedly and he was in the bathroom masturbating. I was so shocked I left immediately. I was going to pretend I didn't call at all but I know he must have heard me because we only spoke once since, briefly on the phone and he was very nervy. I don't know what to say because I don't want to make a big deal of it. but I think something needs to he said to clear the air between us. : Caught red-handed....oh dear. Anyone's worst night mare. The thing is he can't ask you what, if anything you saw because he doesn't know for sure if you saw any thing. You're going to have to grasp the nettle ... on this one Put him out of bis misery by telling him it's no big deal, hav a joke about it. .and ring the door bell next time.

G A L W A Y C L A R I N B R I D G E P A R I S H HALL
TUESDAYS 6.30PM GALWAY J A M E S O N S H O T E L SALTHTII TUESDAYS I OAM 8.00PM

Galway based healthcare company requires normal healthy females to take part in a consumer study for a pregnancy test. All participants in the study will be financially rewarded.
Volunteers may be pregnant or non-pregnant Pregnant volunteers must be in the first 8 weeks of pregnancy. All volunteers must be between 18 and 45 years Please phone 091 741976 for further details

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SHEDDING

THOSE

P O U N D S : P I C T U R E D AT

THE WEIGH OUT IN PARK
L I O N S CLUB FUNDRAIS

H O U S E HOTEL FOR THE

ING
LENT

SLIM

I N DURING BANK OF

WERE GERALDINE YVONNE

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LOWCALL

LYONS,
IRELAND;

1850 6 3 2 000

DIVILLY, K P M G AND MARY HENNELLY, ROCCA TILES.